homesick

so this is how it feels.

the awful longing feeling that sort of keeps you from doing anything. i should have known this and admit to myself that i am homesick - but it's just me wanting to look tough (this thing about me wanting to look tough is getting annoying day by day).

because i checked my skype every so often to see whether my sisters are online so i could just talk nonsense with them. or bug my office colleagues in YM for the newest office happenings.

or when i tried several times to make that sayur bayam or that bakwan which i failed miserably and it was frustrating because there are times when you just want to be reminded about how good the foods are back home. no matter how tasty the lamb chops or chocolate fish or pavlova here.

so then i went to a malaysian restaurant and had chicken satay for dinner but still the taste is different. they grilled it differently! they cooked the rice differently!

my only remedy now is indomie goreng (god bless pt.indofood sukses makmur) - the only food that i know how to cook correctly.

and then when i got sick all i want to do is eat bowls of congee made by abang tukang bubur mang gendut because it cures flu better than the overpriced medicine you bought.

i just want to speak and type in bahasa indonesia karena itu mengingatkan diriku akan AYAH IBU ADIK TEMAN KAKEK NENEK SAUDARA NDUTY PIM BAKMI AKUN MAIN KARTU POKE SUSHI GORENGAN CINTA LAURA MARTABAK MANIS TEH BOTOL DAN INDONESIA.